• Jordan Rivers

PACIFIC RIM 2: Non-Spoiler Review



If Tommy Wiseau had a baby with the writers of the Suite Life of Zack & Cody, that baby most likely wrote the dialogue in this film. The plot of the overall film and idea behind it was actually a very clever way to progress the series, but by the 45minute mark when the film begins I started to wonder where the fighting was? Pacific Rim is a franchise where giant robots fight giant aliens so I wasn’t looking for an Oscar contender, but I was hoping to see lots of monster fights.


Instead all I got was scene after scene where one character leaves frame as the other character says an irrelevant punch line almost directly to camera. It’s like watching the last scene of Top Gun when Tom Cruise says “you can be my wingman” but instead he turns to Val Kilmer and says “Beetlejuice” 3 times.


If you’re worried about taking kids to see this film, I promise you they’ll understand exactly what’s going on, because there’s more exposition than a year 10 media studies film. I’m also confused as to who loves who as there’s about 5 different romantic relationships in the film and all of them go no where and revolve around weird shoulder touching.


To top it off the film ends with an awkward snowball fight, which was kind of like the final “oh hey mark” of the film. The fighting and Idea was very cool though. So out of 10 if 3 is OK then this film gets a JORDAN RATING of 2/10